I’m Feeble Jacobus, fans call me Weak Jake.
You’ve seen me win a title, but that was a deepfake.
I keep as a keepsake the belt that I spraypainted.
I’m a little inauthentic, but that’s the refrain, ain’t it?
My signature move, The Inflated Rep, should be embarrassing.
That’s how I keep you looking good in comparison!