All Of Front’s Lyrics


A Little Bit Broad

Apocalypse Bards

A Very Unlikely Occurrence

Bad Nerd

Better At Rapping

Bizarro Genius Baby

Black Box



Captains Of Industry

Charisma Potion

Charity Case

Chisel Down

Colonel, Panic!

Crime Spree

Critical Hit

Dating Profile


Devil In The Attic


Diseases of Yore

Extremely Online

Fast Company (30 Sec. MBA)

Final Boss

First World Problem

Floating Bridge

Forbidden Planet

Freedom Feud

Fresh Dog

Front The Least

Front The Most

Gold Locks

Gonna Be Your Man

Good Old Clyde

Goth Girls

Hassle: the Dorkening

I Can See

I Hate Your Blog

I Hate Your Blog (Unplugged 2019)

I Heart Fags

I'll Form The Head

In Arrears

Indier Than Thou

Internet Sucks

Invasion Of The Not Quite Dead

It Is Pitch Dark

ITC Stranger

IWF (Internetting While Female)

Jacquelyn Hyde

Just Once

Listen Close

Livin' At The Corner Of Dude & Catastrophe

Machine Of Death

Memes Are Stupid

Message No. 419

Mornings Come And Go

Mountain Kind

Much Chubbier

My Sister

Nerd Versus Jock

Nerdcore Hiphop

Nerdcore Rising


Never Read The Comments

Oh, The Hilarity

Origin Of Species

Penny Arcade Theme

Power User

Pr0n S0ng

Rappers We Crush

Rewind That Back

Rhyme of the Nibelung

Romantic Cheapskate (Song Fight version)

Romantic Cheapskate v.2.0

Scare Goat

Secrets From The Future

Shame of the Otaku



Small Data

Sockington 1M Theme

Socks On


Special Delivery

Speed Queen

Spoiler Alert

Start Over

Stoop Sale


The Council Of Loathing

This Is Not A Drill

This Old Man

Tongue-Clucking Grammarian

TP Factory Tour

Twenty-Six Hundred

Two Dreamers

Victorian Space Prostitute



Which MC Was That?

Yellow Lasers

You Got Asperger's

Your Friend Wil

Zero Day


Guest Verses

Algorithm (by Mega Ran)

Borken Telephone (by Rock, Paper, Cynic)

Boyfriend Material (by Miss Eaves)

Challenge Your Audience (by Mikal kHill)

Epic Fail (by Ken Flagg)

I Like It (by Supercommuter)

I Need Your Help (by Doug Funnie)

Intervention (by Schaffer The Dark Lord)

Kabuto Party (by Kabuto The Python)

Look At Me (by Allie Goertz)

Mecha Mechanics (by Whoremoans)

Noggin User (by Wordburglar)

O.G. Original Gamer (by MC Lars)

Old Enough (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Oneonta (by MC Lars)

Ping Pong (by Optimus Rhyme)

Plastic Submarine (by The Grammar Club)

Proto Culture Redux [Remix] (by Mega Ran and Del Tha Funkee Homosapien)

Reset Button (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Revenge Of The Nerds Part II (by MC Lars)

Salieri (by Adam WarRock)

Soda Water (by Jess Klein)

Tag Team (by Beefy)

Teenage Dirtbag (by Wheatus)

Wake Up (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Watchmen (by MC Lars and Mega Ran)


You keep on rubbing on my head like you’re trying to get a genie out.
I suggest instead: present your problem freely now.
Easy how it’s put into words and then dismantled.
This is the technique that I prefer. It’s as good as handled
if I’ve heard it. You need a verdict or a parsing,
the perfect scrabble word, or an alibi for arson,
or a parson for your wedding, or a person for your team,
or somebody to discover you and realize your dreams.
Now it seems like it’s impossible for a solitary rapper
to guarantee the fix without regard to what’s the matter,
yet I stand here certain I can settle all confusion.
MC Frontalot’s your one-stop solution.

No riddle to test resolve,
no middle it’s best dissolved.
What gets sorted out last of all
gets solved. It gets solved.

Who’s asking to advance the cause?
Who’s answering the casting calls?
What gets sorted out last of all
gets solved. It gets solved.

You say, “Front, yo, that’s your answer for everything:
just tell you the problem, my cares will go languishing.”
Anguish in, anguish out, I always caution.
If you’d lean on me more, you’d be in contortion half as often.
If you’d just open up, you wouldn’t have to hunker down,
trying to sort it for yourself. Your buddy Front is around!
Come on, what is it now? Finances? Romance souring?
Puzzled how it is that my advice is so damn towering?
This I recommend: don’t call a gift horse dentist.
Just take my two cents; they could be more expensive
if ignored. You must entrust me with your need to know the way.
I can fix the future for you here today.

Everybody wonders when the world will end,
hoping that I’ll say it isn’t going to. Make pretend
that this timed sprint could easily last forever.
Peruse fine print. Don’t skim breezily past addenda
rendering all promises subject to change.
There’s only so much of the universe that I can re-arrange.
Can’t seem to get estranged from the laws of physics.
Don’t know the lotto, or the number on your brain. (What is it?)
And also, if your trouble is me?
I’ve been pondering solutions since 1973.
None were satisfactory. So let’s focus
on everything else; your problems — I got this.

Lyrics Copyright © 1999-2020 by MC Frontalot / Published by Nerdcore Fervor Conglomerated (ASCAP)