All Of Front’s Lyrics


A Little Bit Broad

Apocalypse Bards

A Very Unlikely Occurrence

Bad Nerd

Better At Rapping

Bizarro Genius Baby

Black Box



Captains Of Industry

Charisma Potion

Charity Case

Chisel Down

Colonel, Panic!

Crime Spree

Critical Hit

Dating Profile


Devil In The Attic


Diseases of Yore

Extremely Online

Fast Company (30 Sec. MBA)

Final Boss

First World Problem

Floating Bridge

Forbidden Planet

Freedom Feud

Fresh Dog

Front The Least

Front The Most

Gold Locks

Gonna Be Your Man

Good Old Clyde

Goth Girls

Hassle: the Dorkening

I Can See

I Hate Your Blog

I Hate Your Blog (Unplugged 2019)

I Heart Fags

I'll Form The Head

In Arrears

Indier Than Thou

Internet Sucks

Invasion Of The Not Quite Dead

It Is Pitch Dark

ITC Stranger

IWF (Internetting While Female)

Jacquelyn Hyde

Just Once

Listen Close

Livin' At The Corner Of Dude & Catastrophe

Machine Of Death

Memes Are Stupid

Message No. 419

Mornings Come And Go

Mountain Kind

Much Chubbier

My Sister

Nerd Versus Jock

Nerdcore Hiphop

Nerdcore Rising


Never Read The Comments

Oh, The Hilarity

Origin Of Species

Penny Arcade Theme

Power User

Pr0n S0ng

Rappers We Crush

Rewind That Back

Rhyme of the Nibelung

Romantic Cheapskate (Song Fight version)

Romantic Cheapskate v.2.0

Scare Goat

Secrets From The Future

Shame of the Otaku



Small Data

Sockington 1M Theme

Socks On


Special Delivery

Speed Queen

Spoiler Alert

Start Over

Stoop Sale


The Council Of Loathing

This Is Not A Drill

This Old Man

Tongue-Clucking Grammarian

TP Factory Tour

Twenty-Six Hundred

Two Dreamers

Victorian Space Prostitute



Which MC Was That?

Yellow Lasers

You Got Asperger's

Your Friend Wil

Zero Day


Guest Verses

Algorithm (by Mega Ran)

Borken Telephone (by Rock, Paper, Cynic)

Boyfriend Material (by Miss Eaves)

Challenge Your Audience (by Mikal kHill)

Epic Fail (by Ken Flagg)

I Like It (by Supercommuter)

I Need Your Help (by Doug Funnie)

Intervention (by Schaffer The Dark Lord)

Kabuto Party (by Kabuto The Python)

Look At Me (by Allie Goertz)

Mecha Mechanics (by Whoremoans)

Noggin User (by Wordburglar)

O.G. Original Gamer (by MC Lars)

Old Enough (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Oneonta (by MC Lars)

Ping Pong (by Optimus Rhyme)

Plastic Submarine (by The Grammar Club)

Proto Culture Redux [Remix] (by Mega Ran and Del Tha Funkee Homosapien)

Reset Button (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Revenge Of The Nerds Part II (by MC Lars)

Salieri (by Adam WarRock)

Soda Water (by Jess Klein)

Tag Team (by Beefy)

Teenage Dirtbag (by Wheatus)

Wake Up (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Watchmen (by MC Lars and Mega Ran)

Romantic Cheapskate V.2.0

I’ll read you poetry, I’ll tell you what I know to be true.
I’ll make a sentimental observation about the moon.
I’ll kiss you so that you could think that kisses are sublime,
but i won’t spend a penny
‘cause all that you’re worth is my time.

You want flowers; I understand that flowers are grand.
They tend to pretty up a gentleman caller’s left hand.
They don’t stand in for love but they symbolize aptly.
Grab a handful of blossoms as I pass by the crab tree,
hand these to the recipient of my affections,
urge they float in a crystal bowl (which I don’t provide). The misdirections
of the close magic practitioner
are like Bruce Wayne’s winking subterfuge with the commissioner
as compared to my ability
to convince you that the mints you had, fragility
of wafer-thinness established, were gourmet,
palmed though they were from the bulk bin at Safeway.
Hey! You want better? You better want what you need,
not too much in excess of that lest you flaunt with your greed.
“I want to be in love at any price.”
Who would seek a dozen roses when a posy would suffice?

And I don’t mean to bother my pretty head with the math
but I’ve yet to spend a nickel and I’m pretty good with the past.
I’m pretty solid on the figures. They add up:
curvature never to enter into the graph of the ones that had love.
An ever-rising number of ‘em! Oh but you’re final.
Take the needle off the record, take the finger off the vinyl.
I’ll assign all necessary function to the heart.
Don’t know the economy of the energy that’s involved but it’s apart
from the pocketbook and the book-keeping thereof.
That ledger’s glued together; to open up’s very rough,
very difficult, barely worth the effort.
You wonder when we’re going to Peru again? Never.
Sever that fantasy from out your conscious mind
‘less you’re springing for the cab ride down (then that’s just fine).
I don’t offer brimming coffers on the cost of your disgrace.
I can tender sweet nothings, come on over to my place.

We write rhymes when you meet us on the shores of the Seine.
You and we, in between us there’s a gathering refrain:
“cheapskates,” what you call us in those moments of disdain,
and it don’t seem to me we’re entitled to the name.
Cheap-what?! Dirty word for such a generous soul,
who could lavish affection without any venerous goal,
or who, with such a goal in mind, could apprehend
any climax in the offing so as not to precede a friend.
And indeed the end of the world could be upon us:
it could be you and me blazingly enough to astonish
all onlookers with the glory of our passion.
I know my sentimental earnestness is not so much in fashion
but I keep it ‘round the house; some day you’ll think it’s vintage
instead of deeming it narcotic (as is Olive’s take on spinach).
I’m going to finish what I started with you, this you can expect.
And I’ll call it never-ending when I call you up collect.

Lyrics Copyright © 1999-2020 by MC Frontalot / Published by Nerdcore Fervor Conglomerated (ASCAP)