All Of Front’s Lyrics


A Little Bit Broad

Apocalypse Bards

A Very Unlikely Occurrence

Bad Nerd

Better At Rapping

Bizarro Genius Baby

Black Box



Captains Of Industry

Charisma Potion

Charity Case

Chisel Down

Colonel, Panic!

Crime Spree

Critical Hit

Dating Profile


Devil In The Attic


Diseases of Yore

Extremely Online

Fast Company (30 Sec. MBA)

Final Boss

First World Problem

Floating Bridge

Forbidden Planet

Freedom Feud

Fresh Dog

Front The Least

Front The Most

Gold Locks

Gonna Be Your Man

Good Old Clyde

Goth Girls

Hassle: the Dorkening

I Can See

I Hate Your Blog

I Hate Your Blog (Unplugged 2019)

I Heart Fags

I'll Form The Head

In Arrears

Indier Than Thou

Internet Sucks

Invasion Of The Not Quite Dead

It Is Pitch Dark

ITC Stranger

IWF (Internetting While Female)

Jacquelyn Hyde

Just Once

Listen Close

Livin' At The Corner Of Dude & Catastrophe

Machine Of Death

Memes Are Stupid

Message No. 419

Mornings Come And Go

Mountain Kind

Much Chubbier

My Sister

Nerd Versus Jock

Nerdcore Hiphop

Nerdcore Rising


Never Read The Comments

Oh, The Hilarity

Origin Of Species

Penny Arcade Theme

Power User

Pr0n S0ng

Rappers We Crush

Rewind That Back

Rhyme of the Nibelung

Romantic Cheapskate (Song Fight version)

Romantic Cheapskate v.2.0

Scare Goat

Secrets From The Future

Shame of the Otaku



Small Data

Sockington 1M Theme

Socks On


Special Delivery

Speed Queen

Spoiler Alert

Start Over

Stoop Sale


The Council Of Loathing

This Is Not A Drill

This Old Man

Tongue-Clucking Grammarian

TP Factory Tour

Twenty-Six Hundred

Two Dreamers

Victorian Space Prostitute



Which MC Was That?

Yellow Lasers

You Got Asperger's

Your Friend Wil

Zero Day


Guest Verses

Algorithm (by Mega Ran)

Borken Telephone (by Rock, Paper, Cynic)

Boyfriend Material (by Miss Eaves)

Challenge Your Audience (by Mikal kHill)

Epic Fail (by Ken Flagg)

I Like It (by Supercommuter)

I Need Your Help (by Doug Funnie)

Intervention (by Schaffer The Dark Lord)

Kabuto Party (by Kabuto The Python)

Look At Me (by Allie Goertz)

Mecha Mechanics (by Whoremoans)

Noggin User (by Wordburglar)

O.G. Original Gamer (by MC Lars)

Old Enough (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Oneonta (by MC Lars)

Ping Pong (by Optimus Rhyme)

Plastic Submarine (by The Grammar Club)

Proto Culture Redux [Remix] (by Mega Ran and Del Tha Funkee Homosapien)

Reset Button (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Revenge Of The Nerds Part II (by MC Lars)

Salieri (by Adam WarRock)

Soda Water (by Jess Klein)

Tag Team (by Beefy)

Teenage Dirtbag (by Wheatus)

Wake Up (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Watchmen (by MC Lars and Mega Ran)

Origin Of Species

Congregation, settle in your seats.
The Reverend Front Aloud is on the mic and about to speak.
I’m about to freak you out, make you shiver in the pew
while I’m delivering to you my sermon and divinity ensues,
brought by the one true God. It’s a fact:
anybody else who ever had a God, their God’s wack.
We ain’t got to worry about ‘em; we picked the right horse.
You’re in the right house of worship (of course),
and forces are gathering out in the world
to diminish our faith in ways radical and thorough,
to discourage us from loving anything that’s immaterial,
to tempt our children with ever fruitier cereal,
and worst of all, to call us idiots while they do it.
My congregation, listen; I’m about to walk you through it.
We’re going to take the nation back from the heathens that’s within it.
We’re going to get the most egregious of the atheists imprisoned,
cause a schism while we’re at it, but emerge on top,
and once we’ve purified our ranks we won’t stop.
We’ll purify your minds of what’s illegitimately thought.
It’s not to be a battle indiscriminately fought,
but an orchestrated effort, and I’m going to need you to commit.
Might take a couple generations for this deviltry to quit.
Start with the kids — in fact, they get distracted from the Lord —
so I’d like you to write a couple letters to your school board.

Do you, do you really believe
that we were nothing but them monkeys swinging up in the trees?
Don’t it seem a little likelier that Adam and Eve
did a lot of humping, and that was the origin of the species?

And what has this so-called science ever done for us
but trumpeted that when ashes go to ashes & dust to dust,
despite the fuss of living, energy gets conserved.
Denying the weight of the soul of a man: this is ill deserved.
This is still the curse of Copernicus that we suffer.
Secular thought ought not to overflow its buffer
and run roughshod through the minds of you, the population.
Heretics such as Dawkins and Sagan overstep their station
to say that what we see and what we believe should be confluent.
Look to your Reverend to end apostasy — that’s what I’m doing!
Look to your Holy Book to light the way; that is its purpose.
Open it up and you’ll find Eden ‘fore you even scratch the surface.
And sure, this should be mirrored in the textbooks verbatim
but I’m not in a position yet to issue ultimatum.
So I lay down my scheme: we’ll make it seem as though creation
Isn’t anything we’d like to interject to education.
We’ll wrangle up the language: science, data, theorem,
the irreducible complexity of the ears we use to hear ‘em
gnashing teeth and wailing from Kansas to PA.
Yes, my flock, I talk of futures not imminent but underway.
Already established an Institute for Discovery.
Discovered that Darwin is dead with outlook grim for recovery.
Schoolmarms will soon say that he burns in a fiery sea.
Think how much like paradise that’s gonna be.

Lyrics Copyright © 1999-2020 by MC Frontalot / Published by Nerdcore Fervor Conglomerated (ASCAP)