All Of Front’s Lyrics

80085

A Little Bit Broad

A Very Unlikely Occurrence

Bad Nerd

Better At Rapping

Bizarro Genius Baby

Black Box

Braggadocio

Canadia

Captains Of Industry

Charisma Potion

Charity Case

Chisel Down

Colonel, Panic!

Crime Spree

Critical Hit

Dating Profile

DDoS

Devil In The Attic

Disaster

Diseases of Yore

Extremely Online

Fast Company (30 Sec. MBA)

Final Boss

First World Problem

Floating Bridge

Forbidden Planet

Freedom Feud

Fresh Dog

Front The Least

Front The Most

Gold Locks

Gonna Be Your Man

Good Old Clyde

Goth Girls

Hassle: the Dorkening

I Can See

I Hate Your Blog

I Heart Fags

I'll Form The Head

In Arrears

Indier Than Thou

Internet Sucks

Invasion Of The Not Quite Dead

It Is Pitch Dark

ITC Stranger

IWF (Internetting While Female)

Jacquelyn Hyde

Just Once

Listen Close

Livin' At The Corner Of Dude & Catastrophe

Machine Of Death

Memes Are Stupid

Message No. 419

Mornings Come And Go

Mountain Kind

Much Chubbier

My Sister

Nerd Versus Jock

Nerdcore Hiphop

Nerdcore Rising

Nerdlife

Never Read The Comments

Oh, The Hilarity

Origin Of Species

Penny Arcade Theme

Power User

Pr0n S0ng

Rappers We Crush

Rewind That Back

Rhyme of the Nibelung

Romantic Cheapskate (Song Fight version)

Romantic Cheapskate v.2.0

Scare Goat

Secrets From The Future

Shame of the Otaku

Shellfishcore

Shudders

Small Data

Sockington 1M Theme

Socks On

Solved

Special Delivery

Speed Queen

Spoiler Alert

Start Over

Stoop Sale

Synonyms

The Council Of Loathing

This Old Man

Tongue-Clucking Grammarian

TP Factory Tour

Twenty-Six Hundred

Two Dreamers

Victorian Space Prostitute

Wakjakaga

Wallflowers

Which MC Was That?

Yellow Lasers

You Got Asperger's

Your Friend Wil

Zero Day

 

Guest Verses

Borken Telephone (by Rock, Paper, Cynic)

Boyfriend Material (by Miss Eaves)

Challenge Your Audience (by Mikal kHill)

Epic Fail (by Ken Flagg)

I Like It (by Supercommuter)

I Need Your Help (by Doug Funnie)

Intervention (by Schaffer The Dark Lord)

Kabuto Party (by Kabuto The Python)

Look At Me (by Allie Goertz)

Mecha Mechanics (by Whoremoans)

Noggin User (by Wordburglar)

O.G. Original Gamer (by MC Lars)

Oneonta (by MC Lars)

Ping Pong (by Optimus Rhyme)

Plastic Submarine (by The Grammar Club)

Reset Button (by Random AKA Megaran)

Salieri (by Adam WarRock)

Soda Water (by Jess Klein)

Teenage Dirtbag (by Wheatus)

Wake Up (by Random AKA Megaran)

Watchmen (by MC Lars and Random)

Dating Profile

Before you look at me like I’m a neo-Luddite,
all screens point at me at once in a real floodlight.
Ideally sunlight would bathe me more often
between now and a million internets and a coffin.
Can’t soften up my viewpoint:
modern love is the realm and computron is the true coin.
And that’s it for you, boy. You’re forty-two and the coif fled.
Better find true love immediately, as you’ve oft said.
So you figure the thing out, pick out a password,
look in your digital photographs folder over the last third
of your life. Is anything plausibly still hot?
What kind of hope about love have you impossibly still got
lodged in your nerd mind?
Don’t you remember biology, all of the sad ones that the herd find
difficult to cope with
left the group and weren’t eloped with.

Before you look at me
I could tell, you could be
All that I have ever wanted

Cant trick you perfect. Nevertheless!
Ever since Guttenberg and Rosanna Arquette’s
mise-en-scène, brandishing the sheaf of dot-matrix,
your belief in top basics got stasis.
You take ways that you might not be forgivable, reveal them.
List your investment in every real un-
shakable truth that you’ve ever pondered.
That profile text seems far off. You never wander.
You write what you’ve seen people write, like:
you feel extreme nostalgia for Excitebike;
you read this book once and you quite liked it;
screens keep you company bright nights like these.
There’s a reply! This thing is pinging at you.
Look at his eyes: both of them singing at you.
He’s in disguise as you, except beautiful.
Offers his services. Whispers he’s dutiful.

Wait, it’s the dating app. It made a map of your whole identity,
but with all of the things that your soul intends to be
punched up and expressed now unequivocally.
Plus, it fixed your chin, and the whole thing’s riveting.
It’s leveraging a neural network on your behalf.
Check the projected effectiveness there on the graph.
If you let go, it’ll send notes to other romance-seeking persons,
or rather to the prettier, funnier, geekier versions
of those humans that the system surely improved.
Your algorithm is better at flirting than you.
Their algorithms are better at flirting back.
Your virtual face, already out on a date with your top match.
Each of your virtual fleshes intertwine,
and even though you’re not participating, this is fine.
It’s kind of ideal as your dating endgame:
bot’s got your heart simulating on the mainframe,
keeps it beating in your name.

Lyrics Copyright © 1999-2018 by MC Frontalot / Published by Nerdcore Fervor Conglomerated (ASCAP)