All Of Front’s Lyrics


A Little Bit Broad

Apocalypse Bards

A Very Unlikely Occurrence

Bad Nerd

Better At Rapping

Bizarro Genius Baby

Black Box



Captains Of Industry

Charisma Potion

Charity Case

Chisel Down

Colonel, Panic!

Crime Spree

Critical Hit

Dating Profile


Devil In The Attic


Diseases of Yore

Extremely Online

Fast Company (30 Sec. MBA)

Final Boss

First World Problem

Floating Bridge

Forbidden Planet

Freedom Feud

Fresh Dog

Front The Least

Front The Most

Gold Locks

Gonna Be Your Man

Good Old Clyde

Goth Girls

Hassle: the Dorkening

I Can See

I Hate Your Blog

I Hate Your Blog (Unplugged 2019)

I Heart Fags

I'll Form The Head

In Arrears

Indier Than Thou

Internet Sucks

Invasion Of The Not Quite Dead

It Is Pitch Dark

ITC Stranger

IWF (Internetting While Female)

Jacquelyn Hyde

Just Once

Listen Close

Livin' At The Corner Of Dude & Catastrophe

Machine Of Death

Memes Are Stupid

Message No. 419

Mornings Come And Go

Mountain Kind

Much Chubbier

My Sister

Nerd Versus Jock

Nerdcore Hiphop

Nerdcore Rising


Never Read The Comments

Oh, The Hilarity

Origin Of Species

Penny Arcade Theme

Power User

Pr0n S0ng

Rappers We Crush

Rewind That Back

Rhyme of the Nibelung

Romantic Cheapskate (Song Fight version)

Romantic Cheapskate v.2.0

Scare Goat

Secrets From The Future

Shame of the Otaku



Small Data

Sockington 1M Theme

Socks On


Special Delivery

Speed Queen

Spoiler Alert

Start Over

Stoop Sale


The Council Of Loathing

This Is Not A Drill

This Old Man

Tongue-Clucking Grammarian

TP Factory Tour

Twenty-Six Hundred

Two Dreamers

Victorian Space Prostitute



Which MC Was That?

Yellow Lasers

You Got Asperger's

Your Friend Wil

Zero Day


Guest Verses

Algorithm (by Mega Ran)

Borken Telephone (by Rock, Paper, Cynic)

Boyfriend Material (by Miss Eaves)

Challenge Your Audience (by Mikal kHill)

Epic Fail (by Ken Flagg)

I Like It (by Supercommuter)

I Need Your Help (by Doug Funnie)

Intervention (by Schaffer The Dark Lord)

Kabuto Party (by Kabuto The Python)

Look At Me (by Allie Goertz)

Mecha Mechanics (by Whoremoans)

Noggin User (by Wordburglar)

O.G. Original Gamer (by MC Lars)

Old Enough (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Oneonta (by MC Lars)

Ping Pong (by Optimus Rhyme)

Plastic Submarine (by The Grammar Club)

Proto Culture Redux [Remix] (by Mega Ran and Del Tha Funkee Homosapien)

Reset Button (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Revenge Of The Nerds Part II (by MC Lars)

Salieri (by Adam WarRock)

Soda Water (by Jess Klein)

Tag Team (by Beefy)

Teenage Dirtbag (by Wheatus)

Wake Up (by Random AKA Mega Ran)

Watchmen (by MC Lars and Mega Ran)

Romantic Cheapskate

I’ll read you poetry, I’ll tell you what I know to be true.
I’ll make a sentimental observation about the moon.
I’ll kiss you so that you could think that kisses are sublime,
but I won’t spend a penny
‘cause all that you’re worth is my time.

I got this relationship with Song Fight. We go way back.
And we never broke up but months’ll go by when I don’t call back.
And Song Fight’s on my answering machine crying, drunk on a weeknight,
begging me just to sneak by.
I keep bypassing the fashionable titles,
unbridling beats this thick plus dope recital
only once per blue moon, coincidental with a typhoon
of votes in my favor, and doom
for any rival of romantic intent.
No matter how I treat her, Song Fight loves me best.
Even though I never once took her someplace nice,
all I’ve ever got to do is look her deep in the eyes,
open up the trap, let the romance flow,
and MC Frontalot has got her good to go.

I come from the old school of the Song Fight where you must win.
It wasn’t polite back then to talk about what band who’s in.
Just get in the ring!
And it had better sound a little like you know how to sing,
or else what you wasting my time for? I don’t get, like, “free internet.”
My bandwidth’s limited.
I mean in stead-d-d of this, I could be fishing for pr0ns with my dick out.
All kinds of opportunities stick out
in my mind when I consider not clicking
this list of your lame ass eight times cause you’re that tricky.
And nobody clicks twice on these songs that you tape
except by mistake, and hit escape.
Then again, I love every single worthless last one of you.
You’re like a bottomless drain for my invective to funnel through.
And you can call her every week, you won’t win the heart.
Song Fight was Frontalot’s (when?) from the start.

Now for the rest of you song fight types up long nights
trying to get the solo right, hope somebody on the boards is nice,
holds your hand, says it’s okay that Front always wins,
that your song isn’t necessarily shallow and thin,
like one of the rest of you said in the review thread,
hoping to earn Song Fight’s love and respect.
Nevertheless, the actual fact of the situation:
Song Fight is stingier than I am, and she’s patient.
She waits when she has to for Frontalot to come,
endures bunk songs that would knock many wooees numb.
But not my Song Fight, she’s ever vigilant.
I stick my tongue in her butthole and wiggle it.
Even though I call her up collect for phone sex,
MC Front jumps the line, comes next.
And all y’all with your big bouquets could wait out here
while I whisper sweet nothing rhymes up in her ear.
Never you fear, Song Fight, I’m holding you dear.

Lyrics Copyright © 1999-2020 by MC Frontalot / Published by Nerdcore Fervor Conglomerated (ASCAP)